


Your Soft Embrace

by Bereus



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drabble, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot, Other characters mentioned - Freeform, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Reader is Not My Unit | Byleth, Reader-Insert, Sad with a Happy Ending, Slow Romance, based on chapter 5, gender neutral reader, hinted romance - Freeform, mentioned miklan gautier, no beta we die like Glenn, reader is not byleth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:21:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21930625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bereus/pseuds/Bereus
Summary: As the Blue Lions mission for Verdant Rain Moon comes closer, Sylvain becomes more distance from his classmates. Bothered by Sylvain's distant behavior the reader lies restlessly awake before attempting to confront him.-“I can’t help but feel responsible for his actions, because I have what should’ve been his. If he had been born with a crest, and I hadn’t, would things have turned out differently? Who's to say- All I know is that there’s no use thinking about ‘what if’s’, because at the end of the month; It’ll all be over. I’ll be alive and he won’t. I’ll have to live out the rest of my days with Miklan’s blood on my hands, my brother's blood, because I was born with a crest and he wasn’t. ”
Relationships: Sylvain Jose Gautier & Reader, Sylvain Jose Gautier/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 97





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is purely for my own selfish entertainment as well as my first post to AO3, although it's not my first rodeo with fanfiction. I used to have a FFN account which makes me feel old. I’m posting this more to hold myself accountable in practicing my writing rather than for an audience, but I also want to flesh out that Sylvain/Reader Insert tag eyyyy. 
> 
> I haven’t written anything not college related in over two years so I will most definitely be rusty. I tagged this as a Reader insert but I took elements from an OC of mine to flesh out the reader insert a bit, hope you don't mind. I also haven’t written for Sylvain before so he may be OOC who knows. It's an hour until Christmas Eve where I live so Merry Christmas (Or Happy Holidays you do you), I hope you all have a good day!

Having always been one to love sleep, it irked Y/n to no end that they were still conscious after the sun had long set, and classes were over for the day. Most student’s by this hour were asleep in their beds, blissfully unconscious, the lucky bastards. Y/n however remained awake, eyes refusing to remove themselves from the stone ceiling of their dorm room, wishing for nothing more than to feel their heavy eyelids slowly close and slip into a state of mindlessness. 

Yet their wish was denied as their brain refused to turn off for the night. Instead their thoughts wandered to their class's mission for the month, to retrieve the Lance of Ruin from some bandit’s at Conand Tower. Specifically, the bandit's leader Miklan, the disowned heir of House Gautier.

While Y/n hadn’t been raised in Gautier territory, having instead been a household servant for Duke Fraldarius’s family for all of their life, it was common gossip in the estate that the two Gautier brothers had a strained relationship. Y/n remembered one instance of a young and vulnerable Sylvain coming over to the estate to play, his visit lasting unusually long, and his accompanying mother in a foul mood for most of the visit. Felix had been too young to remember, and Sylvain had made no notion of letting his younger friend’s know the intimate details of his abuse. It was only through staff gossip that Y/n had learned what had transpired at the Gautier residence, the fact that the eldest son had tried to kill his younger brother.

Y/n’s stomach twisted at the thought of coming face to face with the disowned oldest son of the Gautier noble family. They thought of how the news had affected Sylvain.

The last time they had seen him had been in the dining hall hours earlier, seated by their fellow Blue Lions listening to Ashe and Ingrid talk about their latest ventures in literature. Sylvain resided in the group but was uncharacteristically quiet, only turning on the switch to his charismatic personality when eyes looked at him with concern. Eventually he excused himself from dinner to make his way to the knights training area, where he had been cooped up all month, likely training in preparation for the battle ahead.

Y/n knew their eyes hadn’t been the only ones to worriedly follow the red head’s form as he left the dining hall. But none followed after him, Ingrid having told everyone to give him some space after they had all received the news. 

Still, his disheartened silhouette burned itself into Y/n’s eyelids every time they blinked in their dark bedroom. 

Y/n wondered if Sylvain had gone to sleep yet, or if he was still roaming the monastery looking for a distraction. Sylvain was well known to be up at odd hours in the night, either hanging out with women or simply roaming the town at the hillside of the Monastery. Either option wouldn’t have surprised Y/n. Though they had an inkling of where he was, and it wasn’t too far from the Dormitory. 

The thought made Y/n push themselves into an upright position on their bed, grabbing their night robe and jamming their feet into warm slippers before leaving their room in order to check on Sylvain. Their room being located on the first floor made it easy for Y/n to sneak out of the dormitories without alerting anyone to the fact that they were breaking curfew.

The moonlight of the Verdant Rain Moon reflecting off of the pond near the docks proved to be their only source of light. The moon ray’s showed off the fish in its depths, their movements breaching the silence of the night as their fins splashed droplets of water out of the pond and onto the dock. 

Making sure to keep quiet, Y/n toed around the guards patrolling on the grounds. The recent rumors of a masked knight kidnapping girls acting as a reminder for them to move cautiously and quickly.

At last reaching their destination, Y/n found Sylvain standing alone in front of the lit fireplace in the knights training hall. His arms were crossed and a serious expression replaced his usual smile.

As they neared, Sylvain turned his gaze towards their figure, offering a small half smile in greeting, his face half lit by the flames light. Neither of them spoke, instead they stared at the other as firewood crackled and popped in the otherwise awkward silence. Letting out a breath through his nose, Sylvain uncrossed his arms, letting one rest on his hip while the other gestured to Y/n’s form.

“What are you doing up this late?”

Y/n shrugged before curling their arms around their waist, tucking their robes in closer to their body and walking to Sylvain so they could soak in the warmth of the fire near him, their shoulders almost touching. “I could ask you the same thing you know. It’s dangerous to be out past curfew nowadays.”

“Yeah, but I’m always up past curfew. And I can take care of myself. I’m more surprised that a good kid like you is breaking the rules. Is it because you knew I’d be out and just had to take a chance on a midnight rendezvous? How romantic.” Sylvain said with a charming smile.

Y/n rolled their eyes at the implication, too used to his theatrics to take him seriously.

“You’ve caught me, Sylvain. I guess all that’s in order now is to make out.” Y/n said before sticking their tongue out at him like a frog, causing the ginger to laugh.

When Sylvain had collected himself Y/n continued on, speaking in a soft voice. “Actually, I couldn’t sleep, and I thought that you might be in a similar state, since this month’s mission is a little personal to you and all. Everyone's been really worried about you, ya know?” Their eyes locked with Sylvain's dark ones, Y/n’s lips pulled back in a slight grimace while Sylvain kept his expression neutral. The glow of the firelight illuminating the bags under his eyes. 

When Sylvain didn’t reply they kept going. “Though I haven’t seen you flirt with any uninterested girl almost all month until just now, so I’m glad I can rule out the possibility of you having brain damage or being a clone.” Y/n teased with a poke to his shoulder, a teasing smile crossing their face.

Sylvain swatted Y/n’s hand away and hummed in response, his lips thinning into a frown before breaking eye contact with them in order to stare at the fire, his eyes turning liquid gold.

“Yeah, I know.” He replied somberly.

“If you know, then talk to us. Let us help. Or at least keep you company if you don’t want to talk.”

“I know.” He repeated.

Y/n made a face at him. “You’re starting to sound like a music box. If you know, then do me the honors and go to sleep. So that I can go to sleep. My conscience and the sad truth that I care about you as a friend is keeping me from getting some wonderful sleep. You hear that? It’s my bed calling to me, wishing that I would return to it’s embrace.”

“You know, you’re starting to sound like Linhardt.” Sylvain said with a laugh which made Y/n knock shoulder’s with him.

The warmth of the fire displaced the cold silence. The two stood in front of the fire, a heavy question hanging between them in the air. A question that threatened the peaceful atmosphere was bubbling at the front of Y/n's lips. Even having known Sylvain for years, they were still hesitant to ask. They weren’t nobility, nor were they as close to Sylvain as his noble friends, so it felt wrong to ask him in such a straightforward manner. They blamed their tired brain for the fact that the question still made it’s way past their lips as quickly as it did.

“Are you going to be able to fight Miklan?”

Instantly they wished they could reverse time and stop themself from making such a blunder. But they couldn’t so they had to reap what they sowed. 

The comfortable atmosphere broke with the resonance of the oldest Gautier's name echoing off the walls, and the subtle change in Sylvain's body language showing his discomfort. His eyes were still trained on the fire, it’s warmth illuminating his cold expression, his jaw clenched tightly. Sylvain's gaze eventually flickered from the fire to Y/n’s figure, stopping where their nimble fingers were nervously clenched in their nightclothes, he stared at their hands a moment before letting out a calming breath, and once again switched his gaze back at the fire.

Instead of immediately answering them, Sylvain took a step away from the fire, and sat on the plush cushions a few feet away, throwing his head back as he deflated into the couch. Y/n stared at their feet as they shifted from one foot to the other anxiously.

“No matter what my feelings towards Miklan are, at the end of the day, I have to be able to fight him.” Sylvain finally responded. He paused for a moment before continuing slowly and almost hesitant. “I mean, I’ve always had to clean up Miklan’s messes. He’s always been an unreliable figure in my life, even before I knew the reason why he acted the way he does. He was never able to see past my crest and look at me for who I am. He was never able to be the older brother I needed because he was too busy trying to ruin my life like crests had ruined his. I mean, he even tried to kill me a few times as a kid.”

His hand reached up to pull on his locks in frustration. “But even after all of that, I understand why Miklan behaves the way he does. Maybe I would have turned out the same way if I was born without a crest.”

Sylvain released the hand burrowed in his hair and pressed fingers to his closed eyelids as though it would stop his thoughts from spilling out of his mouth.

“I can’t help but feel responsible for his actions, because I have what should’ve been his. If he had been born with a crest, and I hadn’t, would things have turned out differently? Who's to say- All I know is that there’s no use thinking about ‘what if’s’, because at the end of the month; It’ll all be over. I’ll be alive and he won’t. I’ll have to live out the rest of my days with Miklan’s blood on my hands, my brother's blood, because I was born with a crest and he wasn’t. ”

Not knowing what to say but wanting to be of comfort, Y/n slowly approached the red head, aware of his guarded gaze. They decided to sit on the couch, close enough to offer comfort, but a ways apart to allow Sylvain to move away if he didn’t want them near.

Y/n didn’t want him to think that they were trying to get in his good graces like women had in the past. The very thought of Sylvain's self destructive habits left a bitter taste on their tongue. They had to remind themself that the two weren’t close enough for Sylvain to trust them. They were surprised that Sylvain had shared as much with them as he had already. It was rare for him to be so openly vulnerable. They didn't want him to feel as though he chose the wrong person to confide in.

Y/n’s hands clenched into fists in their lap as they stared at sparks of fire crackling into the air before dissipating, pondering over what Sylvain had said before replying. “It’s not your fault, and you shouldn't blame yourself. He made his bed when he let the fact that he doesn’t have a crest consume him. It’s not your fault he wasn’t born with one and you were...And while Miklan’s situation is pitiful, it’s wrong of him to take that out on you.”

They swallowed before continuing, considering their words carefully as they spoke them. ”I hope that one day you’ll believe me when I say that you aren’t defined by your crest. You’re not just some noble with a crest. There are so many other factors that define you. Beneath your dumb playboy attitude, you're a good person, and I’m not the only one who sees this. You may not have had a good older brother figure, but trust me when I say that you are everyone in the Blue Lion Houses Big Brother, Sylvain.”

Sylvain simply listened as they spoke, his level expression soon fading as his lips quirked up into a small smile.

“Wow.” He drawled out slowly as he turned his gaze to Y/n, his eyebrows raised. “To say something so cheesy with a straight face, you can’t deny your crush on me anymore.” He said with a crooked grin.

“Really Sylvain? Here I am pouring out my heart and soul, only for you to deflect, unbelievable.” Y/n muttered in exasperation before throwing their hands over their face as it practically sizzling from embarrassment.

Sylvain let out a short laugh as he peeled Y/n’s hands away from their face. Slowly shifting his grip until he had enclosed their hands in his larger ones, their knees touching as they faced each other. He gave them a soft expression before speaking.

“Thanks. For saying all of that.” He said quietly before shifting his gaze to their hands, rubbing the pad of his thumb over their fingers.

“It wasn’t too cheesy?” Y/n said with a pout, their cheek’s still burning from embarrassment.

Sylvain shook his head, a soft genuine smile on his lips. “No... It was perfect.”

They sat there for a while longer, and while there was much that still needed to be said that lay unspoken, they chose to continue the conversation for another day, and instead watch the fire die out in comfortable silence. The light in the room faded until all that could be seen were the dim ember’s breaking through the ash of the fireplace. Neither person being able to see the other, yet being keenly aware of the other’s presence from their clasped hand’s warmth. Y/n eventually suggested they both get to bed before Seteth or any Knights on patrol caught them out on the grounds so late.

Still holding hands, they made their way across the Monastery before happening upon the dorms. As Y/n moved to pull away and go back to their room Sylvain tightened his grip on their fingers, causing Y/n to look back at him in question.

Sylvain hesitated as he opened his mouth, seemingly caught unaware of what it was he wanted to say. After squeezing their fingers together one last time he loosened his hold on their joined hands, the two separating under the moonlight.

“Goodnight.” He said as Y/n turned their doorknob, their gaze still on Sylvain as they opened their door.

Y/n smiled at Sylvain. “Goodnight Sylvain.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in a day oof.
> 
> I felt inspired so I knew I had to keep going even though it's 11 p.m. right now where I live haha. I will go back and edit this later most likely so it makes more sense. 
> 
> EDIT; HA three month's later and I edited it. Once again at night because that's only time I'm free. I kept the "sleepover" in because I think it's kinda decent, but moved it to it's own chapter as a sort of alternative ending because it bothered me that they were just like 'yes let us sleep in the same bed..because we are friends.' And I did change the reader's gender to gender neutral since that's how I've been writing lately, but maybe I missed a pronoun when editing, lemme know.
> 
> Let me know what you thought! Comments and Kudos are much appreciated and keep me motivated. Hope you're having a good day.


	2. (The Original Ending)

Sylvain hesitated as he opened his mouth, seemingly caught unaware of what it was he wanted to say. Finding his voice he opened his mouth before he could cave.

“Would you mind spending the night with me?” When Y/n glared at Sylvain, he stammered, realizing how it sounded. “I don’t mean like that! I just meant...I don’t really want to be alone right now is all.” Sylvain corrected himself while scratching the back of his head sheepishly.

Y/n opened their mouth to respond, but nothing came out. They knew that they should say no. After revealing such vulnerable feelings to each other, the last thing they wanted to do was make Sylvain think that they were taking advantage of him. But at the same time, they understood what he meant. Thinking it over a moment, and acknowledging the perks of a noble’s bed compared to a commoners Y/n came to a conclusion. 

“I suppose that’s alright.” They answered slowly with a suspicious look still on their face. "No funny business though."

Sylvain’s face lifted in surprise as if he’d expected them to fight with him on it. Though Sylvain recovered quickly and led them up to his room quietly, making sure to take ginger steps around Dimitri's room as the prince was a light sleeper.

As soon as the door in Sylvain's room closed, they stared at each other in tense silence for a moment before Y/n shrugged off their discomfort, kicking off their shoes and jumping into his bed, before pulling the covers to their chin. Sylvain snorted before removing his shoes and tumbling onto the bed. Purposefully rolling over Y/n so he could take the spot by the wall.

When they were both situated, Y/n found themselves once more staring at the ceiling just as they had earlier that very night. Although this time a warm presence beside them allowed them to fall into a dreamless slumber.  
\---  
It was early in the morning when Y/n awoke. Eyes still heavy laden with sleep, they struggled to stay awake. Only feeling prompted to wake up fully when they felt a weight shift across their waist, holding them closer to the source of warmth encompassing them. As their brain began to turn back on, their unfocused eyes eventually landed on the desk across the room where roses placed in a vase resided. They weren't in their own room, but the place was familiar to them. In alarm they quickly pulled the heavy blankets away from their body and looked down, sighing in relief when they saw that they were still in their night clothes.

Y/n hesitantly turned over and sighed in exasperation as their prediction was correct as to whose room they were in. Instantly recognizing the mop of red hair cuddling to their side like a cat to be Sylvain, and remembering the previous night's events.

Although a small part of them found the warmth and intimacy to be nice, and Sylvain did have a soft bed. (Seriously, did the nobles get better bed’s or something? Honestly it wouldn't be a surprise.) Y/n's arms were numb from sleeping in a weird angle which added fuel to fire as they slowly slipped one of their arms out from in between the two of them with the goal to get away. Only to freeze when said man snuggled in closer, resting his chin over their head and effectively burying them into his warm neck. Trapping one of their arms between them while the other freed limb stuck up awkwardly in the air, their fingers moving in an attempt to regain feeling.

Letting out a frustrated puff of air, the captive wiggled themselves out from under the red heads stubbly chin and wormed their way up until the two were eye to eye. Their spine tingled in embarrassment as they felt his warm breath puff out over their face. Opening their mouth to comment their grievances in being trapped in a clingy embrace, Y/n paused as they peered at Sylvain, letting their free’d arm rest on his face, lightly tracing the skin under his eyes. Y/n’s mouth turned downwards as their eyebrows furrowed. The pad of their thumb traced the boy's face gently, swiping from his cheekbone to the bridge of his nose in a methodical notion as they observed his face up close.

His mouth was slightly open in his slumber, allowing drool to come out and wet his pillow. His red curls sticking up in the air in more of a messy style than Sylvain usually went for. He almost looked at peace if not for the crease between his eyebrows. Though it was lessening it’s indentation with every swipe of their thumb. A bitter part of Y/n wondered how often a girl woke up to his sleepy drooling face, but they pushed the thought out before they could think too hard on it.

Soon Sylvain’s face smoothed out. As he shifted to get more comfortable Y/n finally decided to plan their escape, fearing he would wake up any moment and find them creepily staring at him. A part of Y/n, that they often told to shut up, begged to stay in the bed and forget the tasks needed to be accomplished for the day. As the minutes ticked on however they knew they needed to get out of Sylvain's room before anyone else that morning woke up and assumed the worst case scenario, believing Y/n to be his latest conquest.

With one last look at his face Y/n gently detached themself from Sylvain's long limbs and tiptoed out of his room with one last look and a silent goodbye to his sleeping form. Unaware of brown eyes opening and lips softly curling upwards as they traced their touched features once the door had closed. A ghost of a smile on both of their lips as they remembered the other's soft embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you didn't see Chapter 1's end notes I moved the original ending here because while I don't mind it, I'm always down for a fluffy bed scene, I also think it doesn't fit as well with the story. And I've considered deleting the entire story because of this scene (like I did "Your Place with Me" (Rip lmao)), but I wanted to keep it on the platform somehow without disrupting the story. So this was all I could think of. Sorry for the confusion.
> 
> Thanks again!


End file.
